Muesli bars: a staple of school recess, a lockdown Instagram obsession, and now, the subject of a controversial taste test. But here's the shocking truth: most supermarket muesli bars are neither muesli nor bars worth raving about.
My journey with muesli is a long and passionate one. From childhood recess treats to selling homemade batches in uni, I’ve even dedicated an Instagram account (@isthismuesligoodor_shit) to reviewing muesli every few days. I’ve likely tried over 80% of the muesli and muesli bar brands in my area, and I’m here to tell you: the best muesli bars are simply good muesli bound together, with a perfect balance of ingredients and texture. Raw, unroasted nuts? They have no place here.
But here’s where it gets controversial: the muesli bar industry seems to have lost its way. Supermarket shelves are flooded with bizarre flavors—Chokito-inspired bars, Nesquik-flavored rice puffs, and even mint chocolate protein bars. It’s a far cry from the classic muesli bar I grew up with. For this taste test, I set strict criteria: no chocolate, no yogurt, no overly sweet flavors, and no single-serve bars. I wanted to focus on what a muesli bar should be, especially for health-conscious parents packing lunchboxes.
After narrowing it down to 19 contenders, I gathered four friends for a blind taste test at Solstice Cafe in Sydney. What did we find? And this is the part most people miss: even without the dessert-like options, most bars weren’t too sweet, but they also weren’t the muesli bars of my dreams. Instead, we got a mix of basic oat products and some bizarre creations that barely qualify as muesli bars.
The Winner: Nature Valley Crunchy Granola Canadian Maple Syrup
Score: 7.5/10
In a world where chewy muesli bars dominate, this crunchy gem stands out. With 60% toasted oats, it’s a satisfying, biscuity delight that reminds me of childhood. One reviewer even said, “Begging for a glass of milk.” It’s the kind of bar 10-year-old me would’ve fought for at recess.
The Best Nut Bar: Sam’s Pantry Honey Salted Macadamia With Roasted Almonds
Score: 7.5/10
Nut bars are the unsung heroes of the muesli aisle, and this one shines. With a honey-butter appeal (no actual butter, just macadamia magic), it’s “energy dense but in a whole food kind of way,” as one reviewer put it. Another joked, “I’ll be happy to pick this out of my teeth forever, nut bad!”
Best Value: Hillcrest Premium Nut Bars Almonds, Cashews & Cranberries
Score: 7.5/10
Aldi’s offering is a textural masterpiece. Each bite is a surprise—chewy cranberries, creamy cashews, or crunchy almonds. As one reviewer noted, “Just a good nut bar.” If only the nuts were more roasted, it would be perfection.
The Rest:
- Carman’s vs. Hillcrest: A battle of clones. Hillcrest’s cheaper version outshines Carman’s, but both are solidly average. Too much cinnamon? Maybe. But no one will hate them.
- Koja Oat Bites Muesli Slice: A divisive bar. Soft, buttery, and Anzac-like, but the chia seeds are a dealbreaker for some. Love it or hate it, there’s no middle ground.
- Oh So Natural Date & Chia: Gluten-free muesli should be better, but this sticky, undercooked bar falls flat. The cornflakes are lost in a sea of glucose syrup.
- Uncle Tobys Chewy Apricot: Nostalgia in a bar, but the synthetic apricot flavor and sweetness don’t hold up. It’s the memories we love, not the bar itself.
- Mother Earth Golden Oats: Tastes like a vending machine snack. Sweet, coconut-y, and dusty—health food in name only.
- Ceres Organics Banana Bars: Space food for tiny astronauts. The chia seeds overpower, and the texture is muffin-meets-banana-bread. Not in a good way.
- Hillcrest Oat Bars Golden Oats: The worst of the bunch. Dry, moist, and inexplicably strange. One reviewer asked, “How is it both dry and moist?” Avoid at all costs.
The Big Question: Are these even muesli bars? Many barely qualify, and the industry’s obsession with weird flavors doesn’t help. But if you’re looking for a solid option, Nature Valley’s crunchy bar is a safe bet.
Thought-Provoking Question: Should muesli bars stick to tradition, or is innovation the future? Let me know in the comments—I’m ready to debate!
